24 June 2010

My Heart Today

It is VBS week around here, and it has been absolutely fantastic. The kids have been wonderful, loving, obedient, and excited. The parents have been more than willing to step in and help. I really couldn't have asked for a better week at First Christian.

And as I was commuting between offices for my "real job" today, my heart began to break. For whatever reason, the magnitude of what we've done to the Gulf (yes, WE have, not just BP!) in the past 67 days has broken my heart.

See, it's not just Obama or BP or the drillers or the scientists who can't figure it out. It's me. It's you. We're the ones driving our cars around out of convenience, not demanding better forms of fuel. We're the ones throwing away our plastics instead of recycling them because it's easier than carrying them home if there's no bin. We're the ones grilling out because food just tastes better cooked over charcoal (and it does!).

I am just as much at fault for this as anyone with a six- or seven-figure income.

When I look at the pristine white sands, now streaked with oil, I want to cry out, "God, forgive me."

Forgive me for what I've done to this world by my own selfishness.
Forgive me my lust for convenience.
Forgive me my willful disobedience of your command to care for the creation.

What can we do to stop this?
Surely there is something WE can do.
SOMEONE must have an idea about how to stop this spill.

Any thoughts?

My heart needs to find a way to make a difference, rather than soak up the news like the fish and birds are soaking up the oil.


heather said...


I have no thoughts... that I have any idea how to put into words. The past few months this has just been heavier and heavier on me and I try to ignore it and push it aside -after all what can I do, right??- meanwhile hoping beyond hope that someone somewhere somehow will finally come up with a real fix for the gushing oil... and that when all is "safe" we won't forget and move on with the clean up and our lives, but that we'll figure out how to fix our way of life. for real.

Heartbreaking is a good word for it. It physically makes me cringe to think about the vastness of this situation. It's overwhelming and incredible and heartbreaking.

Sarah Snow said...

You are so on to my heart as well- this is the only area that I could call home as a military brat as I spent a record breaking 7 years in Ft. Walton Beach, FL. I hate to admit it- but I've avoided the stories, avoided the pictures and avoided my heart because I don't have time for it to break. Those white sandy beaches are my childhood- and I can't bare to see it smeared. I find myelf saying the same thing- surely SOMEONE can figure this out! In the meantime I hide- bless you for your confessions. May we all confess and then turn. somehow.

LifeAtTheCircus.com said...

Very well said.

Thank you